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Slide 1: How to Stop Child Misbehavior in 20 Days New Child Program Report http://www.parenting-skills.org/ Page 1
Slide 2: Copyright and Legal Notice: Published by http://www.parenting-skills.org/ Copyright©2011. All Rights Reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced or transmitted in any form by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise, without the prior written permission of the publisher. Disclaimer: Information found in this book, “How to Stop Child Misbehavior in 20 Days” Should not be used for diagnosis or treatment of medical conditions, or as a substitute for professional medical care. If you have a health concern or believe you may have a health problem, please consult your healthcare professional. We assert that this is only for informational purposes and is not a substitute for the advice provided by your own physician or other medical professional. You should not use the information contained herein for diagnosing a health or fitness problem or disease. You should always consult your own physician and medical advisors. Reasonable care has been taken to provide you with correct and accurate information, but we take no responsibility, nor make any warranties as to its accuracy thereof. We assume no liability or responsibility for any errors or omissions in the content of our book. http://www.parenting-skills.org/ Page 2
Slide 3: Index Parenting Properly 4 Discipline Your Children 6 Behavior Problems 9 Positive Reinforcement 12 http://www.parenting-skills.org/ Page 3
Slide 4: Parenting Properly: Parenting properly today is not an easy thing to accomplish especially with all of the influences children have on their lives. The world we live in is, filled with all kinds of evil, hateful, and potentially dangerous influences. As parents, we only know how we were, raised by our own parents. Our children do not come with directions, or owners manuals therefore we do the best we can when our children misbehave. When we were young and we misbehaved, we were, spanked, we were, grounded or we had our privileges taken away for days or even weeks at a time. This worked well with us when our parents used these methods to discipline us. In this days and age, this does not work on our own children because of these outside influences. These influences seem to make our efforts meaningless or ineffective at all. One of the reasons for this is peer influence on your child. The parents of the friend your child is friends with may not have a stable household. Therefore, this friend is let do what he or she wishes when he or she wants. This is a dangerous influence for your child. Therefore, one thing you should do as a parent is to sit down with all of the friends your child has and ask a few questions. These questions can make the difference between a well-behaved friend and influence on your child and a friend who will lead your child down the path to trouble. Ask questions like do you have rules in your home, and what do your parents do about discipline in your home. Any question you want to ask the child you should do so. Moreover, go to the parents of the child and ask them or meet with them to see how they are and how they act with their child. Caring attentive parents who do not have discipline problems in their homes will be good parents and raise a good friend to your child. If http://www.parenting-skills.org/ Page 4
Slide 5: however, the child does not want to answer your questions or you cannot get their parents to meet with you. Then you should use caution in letting your child befriend this friend. You can wait until you know for sure that you suspect the friend to be a bad influence. Often your child’s friends are the beginning of the conflicts between you and your children. However, difficult it may be point out that you are preventing your child from seeing the friend because you love your child and only have his or her best interests in mind. Your child may be angry with you for a short time but you are doing what you believe to be best. Other outside influences, like video games, movies, music, television, and even clothing all must be, monitored closely by you as the parent. All parents want their child to have nice things however; they must have the right things to properly, influence their lives. Violent video games, music, television and movies are all bad influences on your children. Therefore, you must listen to these things and watch these things to make sure you know what your child is doing at all times. You can provide your child with the things you want the child to have that are proper influences. Christian books, movies, television programs, family movies and music are all available to you for you to give to your child. Therefore, give your child these kinds of things and you will know what your child sees, hears, and reads and does with his or her spare time. Do not put up with any kind of rude or violent behavior from your child. You must stop this before it begins if your child does something you disapprove of then stop then are there and deal with the problem. Do not let even the smallest word of backtalk go undisciplined. Your child is testing you to see what you will tolerate. You must stop this immediately and let your child know you will not tolerate any kind of disrespect. You cannot allow your child to dress improperly in your home or go outside dressed as a Goth, Gangster or a http://www.parenting-skills.org/ Page 5
Slide 6: Bum. Your child should always dress properly and especially if you have girls this should be closely, monitored. Clothing today has a great influence on children and can be a powerful danger to your child. Your child must wear nice, clean, proper clothing, at all times. You must go with your child and help them to choose what is proper not what everyone else is wearing. You will need to explain to your child that he or she is not everyone else and you want him or her to look presentable. Computers, tattoos and piercing are things that can also be, bad for your child and should be avoided or limited. Computers, can have blocks placed on them so that your child cannot gain access to harmful website and adult sites. You should set rules for the child or supervise the child while he or she is, allowed on the computer as well. You as a parent should not allow your child to get a tattoo or multiple body piercing. You should let your child know that will not be, accepted early on. If you do allow a girl to pierce her ears this should be when she is old, enough to understand this is just a onetime thing. If you use good parenting skills and the proper influences for your child then you will have a better relationship with your child. You will find it easier to communicate with your child if you do this early and continue to talk to the child about all things large and small. Discipline Your Children: Disciplining your children is necessary when a child does something that is against the rules of your home. You must find ways to discipline your child that will not harm the child physically or mentally. One way of doing this is to take away privileges the child likes to do in his or her spare time. The privileges could be taking away their time they can spend on the computer for one to three days. The time restriction should equal the severity of the rule breaking. For instance if http://www.parenting-skills.org/ Page 6
Slide 7: your child said no to you when you asked the child to do something like clean their room. The privilege is, taken away until the room is, cleaned. If this behavior continues, remove other privileges as well. Do not allow them to visit with friends, or remove television until the room is, cleaned. When the child complies, talk with the child and reassure him or her, this will continue if the child continues to behave in this manner. Every time your child pushes, your limits push back by removing privileges until the child complies. Do not raise your voice, or be unreasonable. Tell the child that this is your way of teaching them to honor their home and your words. Asking a child to clean his or her room is a responsibility not an impossible request or a punishment. After all, the child made the mess in his or her own room. Therefore, they should clean the mess up and it should be, done within a timely manner and properly. In the past discipline meant a parent taking a belt or a hand to the child’s bottom in order to discipline. Today however, if a parent is caught disciplining their child in this manner there could be severe punishments afterwards. For it is against the law to spank or hit your child, therefore grounding them would be a better punishment. Grounding means to limit the child’s special activities that the child really loves to do. This could be going to the movies with a friend or the family on movie nights. This could also mean not going to a friend’s home for a sleep over. There are always alternate ways to discipline your child without hitting or saying something to mentally, injure your child. Always look for the alternate ways to discipline before you do something you will regret later or something that lands you in trouble. Time out is a good parenting discipline this is, done by a parent taking the child to a chair or a part of a room. Time out can be any location of http://www.parenting-skills.org/ Page 7
Slide 8: the home as long as there is nothing there to amuse the child or that the child can play with. The area must be boring and therefore not a place the child wishes to be. The parent places the child in this area and sets a time limit according to the behavior severity. Usually a time of five to ten minutes will suffice and should correct the behavior problem. One thing that you can use is a powerful parenting tool that teaches you what to do in these kinds of situations. Parenting tips and techniques that work for other parents will work for you in your situation as well. A parenting program will help you to discipline your child if you do not know how or what you need to do. If you find that you are loosing control of the situation and do not know how you should handle your child. Furthermore, if your parenting skills are just not effective then you must find the answers you need quickly and regain control. Parenting programs have proven useful to many families in the past and will help you to if your child begins to disrespect you or your family. If your child begins to throw tantrums, or if your child becomes violent to you or other family members you need to know what to do. A parenting program can help with these situations and other kinds of behavior problems as well. If you find you are having difficulties with any of the following problems: • Your child disobeys you all the time. • Your child explodes around family, friends or in public. • Your child is lying to you and or sneaking out of the home and getting into trouble. • Your child just ignores everything you say and do. • Your child is disrespectful to other adults and other family members as well. http://www.parenting-skills.org/ Page 8
Slide 9: These are all behavioral problems and there is a way to stop this kind of behavior if you know how. Misbehavior to Great Behavior 20 Days to a New Child Program is a program that can help these kinds of behavior problems. The reason that the program is so helpful is because many other parents have used the program. Therefore, the program has been tested and proven to work with these kinds of behavior issues. You can find the Misbehavior to Great Behavior 20 Days to a New Child Program at the link here in this report just click on the link here. ParentingPotential.com Behavior Problems: Children behave in ways to get attention and these are both good and bad. Parents usually ignore the good behavior and react to the bad behavior. Therefore, the child knows that bad behavior get a response from the parent. If your child does something you disapprove of then you should discipline the behavior. However, you should show approval and praise your child when he or she does well or minds as well. The child behaves properly or misbehaves to get attention from you the parent. Your child wants your love attention and your approval in all things. If the child feels that, he or she is not gaining your approval at home. The child can develop a defiant disorder, thinking that he or she is not good enough or their may be other issues that your child does not know how to deal with involved. The child will become defiant and argumentative. This kind of behavior is extremely difficult for a family to deal with and the behavior is the only way the child has of letting you know he or she needs help. This kind of behavior may also occur at school if the child is seeking approval of a school staff member as well. The child will show signs of this disorder, these signs can be sever, and disturbing to all members involved with the child. Some of the signs of the disorder can be things like. http://www.parenting-skills.org/ Page 9
Slide 10: • Not following the rules of your home or beginning to argue with you and other adults. • The child will have serious problems in school and get into trouble at school and away from home, usually serious trouble with the law authorities. • The child will lie and blame others for their mistakes and behavior the child may even blame you the parent. • The child will make or become involved with the wrong type of friends that will involve the child in drugs or gang activities. • The child may even, use drugs or join a gang if the disorder is not, corrected. • The child will increasingly have difficulties at school and get into trouble at school. This type of disorder can only be, treated by a psychologist and anger management therapy. Especially if the behavior has been, let go for a great deal of time. Often this is because the parents do not understand the defiant disorder. This treatment involves the entire family and time to fix the disorder. Parents must learn how to talk to the child and how to properly, and effectively discipline the child’s behavior. Many different kinds of factors can lead to a child developing the defiant disorder. Some examples of the factors are as follows: • The child does not get the amount of attention he or she believes they deserve. • The child has had to move from one place to another being transferred from school to school losing touch with friends or does not have friends as a result of the moving. http://www.parenting-skills.org/ Page 10
Slide 11: • The child is trying to deal with an absent parent as the result of divorce or death of a parent. • The child feels inadequate or unworthy because he or she does not do well at home or at school. • The child tries to talk to the parents but the parents are too buys working to support the child and family. Any one of these factors can trigger a defiant disorder in a child’s behavior. Furthermore, it can be a combination of many or even all of these factors combined. Therefore, each factor must be, treated separately in order to fix or correct the behavior. Your actions as the parent have major influences on your child or children and you must show each child the same amount of love and attention. You must make time for the child as well and be as involved in his or her activities as possible. If you wish to prevent these kinds of behaviors from occurring; much of the time, you are all your child needs and your affection and love will fix any problem. Begin when your child is young and tell the child often that he or she can talk to you about anything large or small. You must control you anger and your emotions when your child tells you something disturbing and live up to what you are trying to teach your child. Children watch what parents do and try to imitate the parent’s examples in their lives. Therefore, if the child sees the parents do something wrong then the child will believe this is ok because you the parent do it. Parents who are in a divorce or have been divorced must be careful of the people who they choose as future partners as well. A future partner should never be, left unsupervised with any child until after a year of involvement. You must be sure you know that person before you allow your child to be alone with someone new. http://www.parenting-skills.org/ Page 11
Slide 12: The child must be completely comfortable with the future partner or the relationship will cause behavior problems and difficulty between the two of you. Finds ways to spend positive, fun time with your child or children to show them that you do care about them, love them and you will do anything for them at all times. This is the best possible way to prevent any kinds of behavior problems from developing before they even begin. Positive Reinforcement: Positive reinforcement can be, done in many ways always praise your child for good behavior and the little things he or she does. Helping the child and showing the child how to do things properly is positive reinforcement. Positive reinforcement can be fun as well if you have one child or more you can use a reward system of some type to encourage good positive behavior. One good reward system is to make a game out of the reward system. Go to the store and in the toy department find several packages of play money and some small toys to use as special rewards. You can get a dry board to keep track of the behaviors and rewards. Have a family meeting and explain the game to the children. Explain to them that things they do that are good earning them rewards and on your board write what the rewards are worth. For example: Clean room without being told to $1.00 Yes Ma’am Yes sir $0.50 Completed homework $1.50 Picking up toys after playing $1.00 Reading a book $0.50 And so on Bad behavior deduct from the reward $0.75 cents or more. http://www.parenting-skills.org/ Page 12
Slide 13: You can set any amount to any act of good behavior and take away from their total of the play money the child has earned for bad behavior. After each good or bad act give or take away the play money. At the end of the week or month, have the children cash in their play money for real money. When they see that the good behavior and being polite as well as responsible gains them real rewards they will try to behave properly. You then take them to the store and let them spend their reward money on what they want or take them to a movie and let them spend the reward money on games or fun things. This is one of the best reward games for positive behavior reinforcement. You can also think up ways of your own, to positively reinforce your children. You can use stickers, stars or give the special prizes when the child does something unexpected like help set the table or help with the dishes. These kinds of positive reinforcements do not have to be cash they can be a story or a day out just doing fun things as rewards. What ever you choose to do the main thing is that you find ways to positively, reinforce good proper behavior at all time and you must discipline the bad behavior when it occurs. If you begin good positive parenting skills and communicate with your child frequently, you will have a positive relationship with your child. A good relationship with your child from the beginning will prevent most behavior problems from occurring. If however, you find your self in a situation you cannot control or correct then there is help. Misbehavior to Great Behavior 20 Days to a New Child Program will address these kinds of behaviors defined here as well as many other kinds of behavior problems not defined in this report. Many families to correct these kinds of behavior problems in children have used, Misbehavior to Great Behavior 20 Days to a New Child Program. http://www.parenting-skills.org/ Page 13
Slide 14: The program has, worked to correct these problems and gives parents the tools and the knowledge to combat these problems. The program fixes all kinds of behavior problems using alternative means of punishment and positive reinforcement to regain control and restore peace to many families and homes. The program teaches parents how to reopen the lines of communication with their child and begin the healing process for both child and parent. There are many useful tips, and vital information in this program for the parents dealing with these kinds of situations in their child’s behavior. The Mis-Behavior to Great Behavior 20 Days to a New Child Program is available to you here on the internet and will help you with your child. You can simply click on the link here to restore order to your home and family. Click Here to Download The Happy Child Guide and notice positive changes in your child within few days, which give a peace of mind and happiness to your family. http://www.parenting-skills.org/ Page 14